Monday 17 August 2009

Oh For Crying Out Loud


Do these people ever stop?

Charity seeks end to lunchbox ham

Parents have been urged not to put ham and other processed meat into their children's lunchboxes to avoid them developing a cancer risk later in life.

The World Cancer Research Fund said parents should act now to stop their children developing a taste for smoked, salted or cured meats.

So, having forcibly driven any kind of 'treat' food from kids school diets, the cross hair is now turned on ham, with processed cheese being placed on the 'to do' list, no doubt.

The screeching from these professional worriers is fast approaching paranoic proportions. There must surely now be an argument that the panic and stress these 'experts' are inflicting is more dangerous than the negligible long term risk from the foods they are warning against.

The Puddlecotes are off to Kew Gardens today, which is probably a good idea seeing as Comrade Beeb will be showcasing these tedious scaremongering turds throughout the day. And yes, we have ham salad sandwiches in our picnic box.




16 comments:

SaltedSlug said...

You beat me to it.

I have no idea what they expect us all to eat and still have enough for everyone.

Fuck this place.

subrosa said...

We can't eat chicken, salmonella in that, or have egg sandwiches, salmonella in that too. Bought salad has to be washed, bacteria in that, and on and on it goes.

If smoked meats aren't good for you, why hasn't any European country banned them? Most Europeans eat far more smoked meats than us.

Smoked salmon will be next.

Sue said...

They say its "cancer over a lifetime" but it´s strange how they encourage uptake of vaccines which
have shown to be more dangerous.

Still, they need to test their poisonous drugs on someone!

Hundreds get sick from Gardasil cancer vaccine
Death link to swine flu vaccine

Frank Davis said...

Well, what worked for passive smoking should work for everything else, so I don't see why they shouldn't take it to the limit, and further.

I mean, never mind chicken and ham, what about banning knives and forks? Knives are obviously dangerous things. And forks are used to spear things with, and so can be used to spear people in their eyes. Case closed.

Sometimes I think they're doing it deliberately, arguing ad absurdum. Except the argument is being played out in reality, creating an absurd world.

SaltedSlug said...

Maybe that's it, Frank.

Maybe they've actually got a pool going to see just how absurd they can get before even the Beeb goes "Thinking about purple penguins causes Cancer? Oh do fuck off."

The pool must be substantial by now.
Ladbrokes must surely get involved soon.

Witterings from Witney said...

I was about to say thanks for making my day, but having just had a meeting with a local authority about my mother's care home where their only response was to show that all the right boxes had been ticked, I'll let you off!

As far as this post is concerned, I will not accuse you of 'hamming it up'!

Kevin Boatang said...

I'm torn. My libby side says go fuck 'em all and eat what you wish. My stomach says processed ham is an evil that should be torched from the face of the earth.

But hey, if you want to feed your kids some bits of leftover pig that has been pressured together to produce a round of slightly weird, wet 'ham' then go for it.

I hate the cancer thing, because it seems everything, over the course of your whole life, causes cancer. It's the ultimate control tool.

Between climate change over a lifetime and cancer from food and drink over a life time, they've got a nice lobby...for a lifetime.

SaltedSlug said...

Like Dick and I have already mentioned:

Since cancer is apparently off-limits, what do they want us to die from?

Joe Public said...

There's a website somewhere that's carefully logged all 'health-scare' press releases.

It concludes that if one avoids the foods listed, then one dies of starvation, but sooner.

Anonymous said...

In the same paper in which I read this today, there was an article that said that worrying about healthy living is damaging people's health. They've even coined a term for it (sorry, can't remember what it is). The condition is most often found in middle-class, highly educated, 30 somethings (that figures, 'highly educated' under NuLabour's definition, so still incredibly stupid. They cited the case of one idiot who refused to eat anything that wasn't yellow!!! I remember reading somewhere that it's really easy to have a balanced diet because the colour of a fruit or vegetable indicates the nutrients in that food so eat foods of varying hues!

I think that we're witnessing the strategy of the powers that be driving us all to madness whereupon they'll put us out of our misery by lethal injection. World Problems solved!

SaltedSlug said...

Ah apparently Joe has answered my question.

Dick Puddlecote said...

I sometimes think these people watched Edwina Currie in awe back on the 80s/90s cusp.

They had been issuing press releases about food 'dangers' for years but we all merely laughed them off.

Then Edwina (a respected politician, as they generally were then - no, seriously) said, on camera, that there was salmonella in eggs (as there had always been) and people stopped buying them in fear of their life.

Since then, every health scare has been not only PR'd to the media, but a spokesperson from a 'respected' charity (because people still, unbelievably, respect such bodies), and the thing goes mental early doors.

This is the second outing for the ham/processed meat thing. Expect teachers to start confiscating ham sarnies from lunchboxes in abject fear, very soon.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Slug: Your 'pool' idea is alarmingly believable.

Boaty: My kids like what they call 'crumbled ham' from the deli counter. I, on the other hand, love even the crap stuff in cans, fried on a high heat with a couple of large eggs. Carrot and coriander soup just doesn't cut it against such opposition.

I'll take my chances. ;-)

Joe Public said...

Sounds like a Marketing Piece from the Cheapo Ham Suppliers Company:-

"Our ham has less carcinogens ('cos it's adulterated with more water)"

SaltedSlug said...

I mean three three rashers of bacon?

I put that on my fucking cornflakes

BTS said...

This is really good news. The next time a doctor starts to lecture me about drinking and smoking, I can happily point out that I don't eat ham and am therefore trading off the risks..

Dick, be careful of SHS (that would be a Second Ham Sandwich).